Hawaii blues continue

I'm at work sitting in front of my pc, looking a the long list of meetings I have today, which I will need to try desperately not to microsleep through...

I'm at work sitting in front of my pc, looking outside observing the office people in the building across the way, wishing I was looking at the ocean and palm trees...

I'm at work sitting in front of my pc, looking at my cup of coffee and realize that the cup is half empty, and I'm double gutted cause I'm wishing I was drinking a coffee bean tea latte...

I'm at work sitting in front of my pc, being a sad sack in my suit and heels, wishing I was in my bikini on a beach in Hawaii.

I need another holiday. Apologies for the whine-age.

i heart Jason Mraz

I am completely and totally in love with Jason Mraz... Its like my life mission to meet him... I don't really know what I would do if that actually happened. I would possibly have some sort of fit. hahahaha and I still love him even though he is performing this song with some completely random back up dancers which seem so out of context for this song.... Anyways i guess thats how they roll in Brazil

“I left my heart in Hawaiiiii…. There on a a beach it calls to me”

So a gf and I just came back from our Hawaii trip and I have some serious post Hawaii blues. There is something about this place that felt like a perfect fit. I don't know if its just because yes, I was on holidays and yes, I was totally relaxed, but I think that in many ways Hawaii has a lifestyle that I would love for myself in a parallel universe.

It was amazing to wake up every morning and not to have a care in the world. And to meet people who just live for the beach, the sun and the next wave was amazingly refreshing as the water we swam in everyday we were there.

Waking up to the warm air and beautiful palm trees made me feel energised and alive. Looking forward to a new adventure was what we lived for and it makes me question why I couldn't live like that everyday. Am I being unrealistic? I mean I have always been a dreamer, but for whatever reason… there is something about Hawaii that has made me want to chase a new dream…

I would love to move there, learn how to surf and teach random tourists whilst trying not to drown them (or them drown me ;)….).

I could become a hula dancer, wear coconuts and grass skirts everyday- Forget about my suits and heels…

I could take people out on that booze cruise every day and watch the sunset- Forget about my coffee meetings & watching my computer shut down.

I even had a friend suggest that I could be a card dealer- Forget about dealing and negotiating business.

Such tempting offers, when compared to my 8 to 5, some days 8 to 8- desk job which I was so sure I was passionate about 2 weeks ago. Today was my first day back at work, I made it through ok. Mopy, but managed to fit in a smile or two… I may have to wear my bikini under my clothes tomorrow just to get me through.

Anyways, I really need to shake it off…

But I did say to my boy that if I felt like this after a month we need to move to Hawaii, get married and plan to raise our surfer babies. He was happy to oblige ofcourse, however I am sure he thinks that this is another one of my momentary lapses of sanity haha… So we’ll see in a month.

Oh Hawaii blues- woe is me...

Blog-Block Break-through- Now repeat that 5 times really quickly...

I’ve decided that I’m going to post my first ever blog. I’ve tried and failed many times before and I resigned myself to believing that I’m just not the blogging type. But more and more I find myself in situations that I think, wow I would love to share this random-ness with the world, if I could ever commit it to Blogger...

So I’m going to cheat a little and in my attempt to post my first ever blog, I will piece together my First-First efforts of all blogs that I have ever written and never got round to finishing. I’m not sure if that made any sense, but in the spirit of keeping momentum, I shall write type, (ramble) on.

SO here goes. For the first time ever in blog history---this is a compilation of my greatest unfinished works, of when for some apparent reason inspiration just escaped me…

My first attempt was called- “I’m a big girl now…”

I’m a 20-something year old girl, fast becoming a 20-something year old woman. This certainly became apparent some months ago when I started having chats about ‘life defining’ decisions which, in yester-year, were conversations only to be had when I was ‘all grown up’. And with that sentiment I began to feel nostalgic of the days when life was simple and certainly juvenile.

I reminisce back to high school days, when I was a fresh faced teenager. Lunch times with lu-ran-jo + other school chums were spent deciding if I wanted a pizza rounder or a chiko roll for lunch and gushing over my-then latest crush. Fast-forward ten years or so and the lunch times chats in the quadrangle have been replaced with lu+ran+jo minus other school chums at Cargo for cocktails, I am making decisions on where to buy my first home and my latest ‘crush’ is who I’m planning to marry.

Another of my short lived-inspired blogs got me thinking about how far I have come career wise…. But my blog only got me as far as Hungry Jacks...

“She works hard for the money”

When I was 14 years and 9 months old, I got my first job at McDonalds. My first pay slip was fifty two dollars and fifty cents. I worked (slaved) for 10 hours at a wopping hourly rate of $5.25, upsizing meals, offering fries with everything and doing it all with a great big f-ing smile on my face. Except on the rare occasion when I argued with a customer that they actually ordered 3 Big macs, and not the 2 Mc-chicken burgers they claimed. Yes, as a 14 year 9 month old, I lived by the principle that the ‘customer is always right’- only when they are actually right. Combine this with my foul temper and anger-management issues at the time, it made for very not effective complaint resolution and great entertainment for the rest of the crew.

It was tough-going being a front-counter chick and I remember aspiring to one day being the Drive-thru Girl. And that I achieved in my second job at Hungry Jacks.

“Mid-20s Crisis”

A moment of clarity insanity struck me, I’m turning 26 this year. A new sense of angst in me has been roused which I am sure is symptomatic of a mid-20s crisis. In fact, the moment the pin dropped, it echoed with a list of rhetorical questions I asked myself some couple of years ago, now waiting to be answered

“Always the optimist? or am I just delusional?”

I have always thought myself to be quite the optimist, but at what point does optimism cross the line to delusion? Is there really a clear cut line?- I suppose at this point I lost my train of thought cause I couldn't write on… Perhaps the question was meant to be the rhetorical, cause I for the life of me could not answer it. And finally I thought it fitting to end my first ever blog with:

New Years Resolutions

2009... Full of promise with new- new years resolutions to be broken, another year to pass where I am constantly reminding myself that I’m going to lose Weight; learn italian; save more; eat less deep fried foods hence lose weight; start a blog etc.etc.. In this ever repeating cycle of the count down to the ‘New Year’ it seems quite ordinary for mine and in fact nothing really ‘New’ about it at all…

I ‘m currently grappling with the inertia I seem to get in the middle of writing a blog. I can’t quite put my finger on it. But I think it may have something to do with the fact I have a mild and somewhat selective attention deficit disorder and the fact that I can’t sit in front of a computer screen for a prolonged period of time due to my abnormal sensitivity to light…. But nonetheless, I started my first ever Blog. Welcome to my world!

A word of warning for my future blogs in case I might offend you- Some people mistaken my passion for rage. But you’ll find I just really care and feel strongly about a certain things. Such as- How much I HATE it when people drive around with their High beams on. But anyway that's for another blog...